Growing Pains

AAUUGGHH! That's about how I feel at the moment. There's nothing going on and yet everything is going on.

I'm freaking out about my new Mary Kay business. Growing pains, mostly. I freak out, then I'm fine for a while, then I freak out again. Fun rollercoaster. Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway: Truth #1: The fear will never go away as long as I continue to grow. Truth #2: The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out...and do it. AAAUUUGGGHHHH!

There have been a couple of extras casting notices at Hollywood OS that I am appropriate for but they're both on a FRIDAY and I'm not available on Fridays. I'm especially sad because they need extras for Grey's Anatomy tomorrow, I *love* that show, and I have such a crush on TR Knight (Dr. George O'Malley). His character just keeps getting more and more awesome each week, and Knight is doing such a good job with it. AAAUUUGGGHHH!

Okay, on the positive side of things, I found a really great conservatory program to audition for at a local theatre. The director says: "Our STC program is a production conservatory. At this time we are not offering acting classes, but rather performance opportunities. I believe the best way to learn the process of acting in a production is to get in as many productions as possible as quickly as possible. We set aside a certain number of productions in a season for just those in the program without having to compete with the masses, and other more experienced performers. It's hard to get a complete theatre education from an acting class environment although classes have a place in an actors education, and in the near future we will be offering classes as well, but for now we are focusing on developing performers and technicians through actual production experiences." Doesn't that sound awesome?!? Best part: It's free! "We (the theater) benefit from expanding our talent and audience base. You benefit from the opportunity and experience. It's a win-win." I am so there!

And yet...there are auditions coming up for another local theater that pays a stipend to its performers. The play is about NY highschool students, their experiences on Sept. 11, 2001, told in a series of monologues. I think I want to audition for that too. But if I'm cast, that will conflict with the conservatory, I'm pretty sure. AAAUUUGGGHHHH!!

And in other news, The City of The Stars Screen Test 2006 may not be everything they claim. I've been suspecting this for a while. I was afraid to write my suspicions just in case they were unfounded, I didn't want to blow my chances if the City of the Stars casting people happened to read my blog. Things I've noticed that made me suspicious: all the pics of their current "stars" seemed to have an 90's look to them. When I searched for these "stars" on the IMDb, there were no matching results. Supposedly, Carrington Studios (home of The City of the Stars) is a bigger film studio than Universal Studios, with huge mansion estates for the stars to live in, built by billionaire Robert Carrington. But again, there was nothing on the IMDb, or through Google about the construction of these studios, Mr. Carrington, or about "The City of the Stars". I rationalized that they were possibly legitimate, and just creating a fiction to help them grow their business, and I decided to continue collecting votes, albeit not nearly as enthusiastically.

Then a few days ago, I was considering contacting a newspaper writer about writing an article as a way to create more exposure for myself and get more votes, but I wasn't sure how to approach the writers, so I asked for Bob Fraser's advice. He decided to do some digging of his own: "I began checking out the folks behind the contest ­ with the idea of promoting the contest in my newsletter. Very secretive ­ not to mention that all the stuff on their site is fictional ­ there is no city of the stars.The company itself (with questionable entities in the background) has made a total of 1 film. It was a children¹s fairy tale movie. All the people featured on the site, who ARE real, have almost no credits. The billionaire is pure fiction." (Thanks, Bob, for sharing what you found with me!)

So that leaves me wondering how legitimate this whole Screen Test 2006 audition contest is. I can see how they might be trying to create a success like American Idol, and thus establish themselves. But at the same time, creating such a huge fictional front to do so sends up a huge red flag that says: SCAM! But if it is a scam, the only thing I can think of that they'd be scamming for is money: Once they've picked out their "stars", maybe they will require those people to make a large financial investment, I don't know. Common sense tells me that more than likely it is a scam of some sort, but there's no way to be sure. My insticts tell me I should just walk away from this one, and not pursue it any more. There's too much rationalization needed to get around that red flag. So thanks to everyone who voted for me, I'm sorry if I'm letting you all down.