Where am I going?

Hey Everybody!!

Guess what? I LOST 5 POUNDS LAST WEEK!!! WOO-HOO!! I really wasn't expecting to lose anything, because I don't think I was as careful with my calories, and I only lost 1 pound the first week. But I did add in 40 minutes of aerobics after work on a couple of days. (in addition to the 30 minutes of walking I do every day.) But apparently I did something right because I LOST 5 POUNDS!! Yay!! Hey, here's my SparkPeople profile, I've got a cute little weight tracker down at the bottom of my page. Check in on me from time to time!

So, I went to work yesterday morning with the thought in my head that this would be my new permanent job. And as the day went on, I felt more and more that I didn't want to do this every day for the next year or two. And I haven't been able to bring myself to pick up the phone and call my temp co-ordinator. The calm, quiet voice in the center of my mind is telling me this assignment will last as long as I need it to, and that I don't need to "force" anything by asking to make it permanent.

Besides, with the walking and the aerobics I've been doing, I think my knee is finally getting better. I can feel sometimes that I'm pushing to the limits, but I haven't re-injured it. I hope and believe that my knee is getting stronger, and soon I can start working as a massage therapist again. Back to Plan A! But I want to make sure my knee is really really okay before I go getting myself a job in a day spa or something. That would suck if I get a job and then re-injure my knee again right away. Besides, who would hire me if there was a possibility of loosing work hours due to a knee injury? I need to make sure my knee is okay. I'll continue to work out carefully, and then try giving a massage to some people in my family, and when I can do that without pushing the limits on my knee, I will be ready.

Anyhow. I can't sleep tonight because my heart is screaming, the energy is buzzing in the core of my bones: I want to work as an actor. I want to act in TV and film. I want to be part of those dramatic close up moments where the camera looks into your eyes and the audience sees the whole truth. I want to be part of the story and adventure that being in a film creates, that cannot exsist in a stage production. My goal this week is to make time to submit on NowCasting a couple of nights this week. Most of my evenings have been spent entering my food intake into the SparkPeople nutrition tracker. It takes me about 45 minutes to enter one day's food, because the page has to reload after every entry, it's so slow! But maybe if I swap out, enter food every other day, and spend the time I've opened up on NowCasting instead...

I have to do something, because otherwise I'm not going to get anywhere in my acting career. I'll still be sitting here another 5 years from now, writing the same f-ing thing, wondering why it's taking so long for me to make any progress.

GO, IZZIE GO!!